reckless love, with boundaries
Recently been in deep thoughts on the concept of loving others, but also learning to protect and love myself.
How do we manage both?
God's reckless love is selfless and leaves the 99 for that one lost sheep.
It taught me to stop striving to see the change now, and that no matter how much they failed you or themselves, just be there and to not withdraw your love and presence.
But should your love comes at the expense of yourself, do you still go on loving and allowing yourself to be hurt over and over again?
This is when boundaries come in.
Boundaries aren't selfish or self-seeking.
It is self-care. That I care about me too.
Is telling myself to not work harder on your problems than my own.
Not spending time trying to change someone who doesn't want to change.
Not allowing someone to hurt me over and over again.
Not allowing others to control how I spend my time and energy.
That isn't selfish, but is telling yourself that you deserve to be loved, respected and cared for too. Not allowing your love to be taken for granted.
Sometimes it takes firmness with yourself to be free; holding on to the boundaries you decided to set in loving yourself. It takes discipline.
Sometimes it requires surrender. Letting go of expectation and the desire that one day that the individual you have faith in will change. Is always good to hope for the best in someone, but manage and protect yourself in the process too.
I was reminded of the "man and the snake" story. Just because the snake bite him back while the man was trying to help, it did not cease the man's innate nature to care. However, he became wiser to not be too close and using a stick; finding other tools to save the snake rather than allowing himself to be bitten over and over again.
While mentoring requires patience, a "long-suffering" process of believing and waiting, keep in mind that a healthy body and heart is needed to see through that long process as well.
Papa God, perhaps You are teaching me what to hold on to, and when to let go... Learning to love better with boundaries. Be it learning to love others, and equally important, learning to love me.
How do we manage both?
God's reckless love is selfless and leaves the 99 for that one lost sheep.
It taught me to stop striving to see the change now, and that no matter how much they failed you or themselves, just be there and to not withdraw your love and presence.
But should your love comes at the expense of yourself, do you still go on loving and allowing yourself to be hurt over and over again?
This is when boundaries come in.
Boundaries aren't selfish or self-seeking.
It is self-care. That I care about me too.
Is telling myself to not work harder on your problems than my own.
Not spending time trying to change someone who doesn't want to change.
Not allowing someone to hurt me over and over again.
Not allowing others to control how I spend my time and energy.
That isn't selfish, but is telling yourself that you deserve to be loved, respected and cared for too. Not allowing your love to be taken for granted.
Sometimes it takes firmness with yourself to be free; holding on to the boundaries you decided to set in loving yourself. It takes discipline.
Sometimes it requires surrender. Letting go of expectation and the desire that one day that the individual you have faith in will change. Is always good to hope for the best in someone, but manage and protect yourself in the process too.
I was reminded of the "man and the snake" story. Just because the snake bite him back while the man was trying to help, it did not cease the man's innate nature to care. However, he became wiser to not be too close and using a stick; finding other tools to save the snake rather than allowing himself to be bitten over and over again.
While mentoring requires patience, a "long-suffering" process of believing and waiting, keep in mind that a healthy body and heart is needed to see through that long process as well.
Papa God, perhaps You are teaching me what to hold on to, and when to let go... Learning to love better with boundaries. Be it learning to love others, and equally important, learning to love me.
Comments